Yes, Monetize your mess. Sounds weird I know. Trust me, it’s a thing. Celebrities do it all the time. Why not you or me? Think of Kim Kardashian's not so subtle introduction to the world. Yes! That's right. The world found out about Kim Kardashian because of a sex tape of all things. I am not in any way saying to go out and make a sex tape. But think about this for a minute a sex tape literally has led to a billion-dollar brand aka The Kardashian-Jenners. Crazy right? As Kim would say, “not bad for a girl with no talent.” The irony of it all.

You may not be Kim Kardashian. I know some will roll their eyes. But at the end of the day we can kind-of-sort-of take a page from her book. Regardless if you are a Kim K fan or not there is something we can learn from her. Instead of letting a sex tape destroy her, she monetized her mess. Can you say she rose from the ashes like a phoenix?

Her sex tape may have put her out there. However, it is not what has kept her out there 10 plus years later. It’s what she did after the sex tape that put her where she is today. Truth, you don’t build a billion-dollar empire from a low-budget sex tape or 15-minutes of fame. That requires a different kind of hustle. It takes much more to be an expert side hustler like Kim. There is no doubt that Kim has proven herself beyond her sex tape. Her bounce back game was on point. She bounced back in fabulous form since the days of her sex tape. If I’ve learned anything about Kim Kardashian she is an expert at monetizing her mess. You can’t deny that. I can appreciate her bounce back game. 

What I love about what Kim has done is that she didn’t let the sex tape ruin her, because it could have. Instead she owned it. As my grandmother would have said, she took front before front took behind. In other words, she stepped out in front of her mess. Kim leveraged her mess and used it to her advantage. Now here we are 10 years later, and she is a force no doubt. Say what you want, but her net worth and her numbers doesn’t lie.

Not only did she rebrand herself after her infamous sex tape, but she became very business savvy, from clothing, to cosmetics, skin and beauty lines, brand endorsements, books, workout videos, branded merchandise, apps and games (Kim Kardashian Hollywood), kimojis, keynote talks, signature fragrances, public and guest appearances, prison reform advocate, social media influencer, licensing deals, reality shows and spin-offs, and other ventures. The list is endless. You name it, Kim has done it. She has done it all.

I mention all this to say, you can do whatever you want after your breakup. You don’t need your ex’s permission. Their opinions are no longer valid because they expired when you broke up. So, own it, give zero, be over it and on with it!

But what I am saying is simple. Sometimes we go through things and we think all is lost. We think that our life is over. Not realizing at the time that even in our mess, there is something that can come from it. We can learn and grow from it. Not only that, we can leverage it and use it to our advantage. And yes we can monetize it. If I've learned anything from my own breakup after been ghosted following a long-term relationship is that I control the narrative moving forward. Choosing myself has been the greatest gift I've given myself. I've gotten back in the driver's seat of my life and it feels damn good.  Bounce back game on fleek!

You do not need to make a sex tape to monetize your mess. If you’ve had a breakup that qualifies as mess. Here are 5 quick steps to start monetizing your mess.

1: Mine your mess like you are mining for gold. No joke. Comb through your mess for the messiest moments. Write down the hot mess details of each messy moment. think of the challenges you've overcame and what you're done to rise regardless.

2: Next identify the lessons, the big takeaways and a-ha moments you can extract from your messy moments. As you write out the lessons, think about who can best resonate with these lessons?

3: Now for each lesson write out 3 – 5 the specific details and instructions for people to follow how they can apply your lesson to their own life and learn from your lessons. Remember: Your lessons are their blessings. 

4: Then ask yourself who can you help (audience, age) with your lessons and more specifically how can you help them? Make a list of those people you can help ie. newly single moms or dads, divorcees, newly single people, people who've been ghosted etc. (Hint your lessons don’t have to revolve around your breakup). Sometimes our best lessons come from our greatest pain and heartbreak.

5: Now that you have your lessons, your instructions, your audience you want to start testing and sharing your lessons consistently with people either offline or through free online platforms like social media to see what kind of response you get from people. This positions you as an expert.

Depending on the response and questions you get from your audience will determine how best to package your lessons to monetize them. ie. it might be speaking engagements, writing books or articles, blogging, coaching, consulting, starting an eCommerce site (Shopify or Etsy) and selling helpful products, creating videos on YouTube, freelancing your skills, training and teaching others the lessons either online or in person, creating digital products (eBooks, workbooks or courses) etc. How will you package your products to get paid? Just an FYI the elearning/information products industry is pacing to 325 billion dollars by 2025.

These are just a handful of ways how you can monetize your mess and get paid. The key is to package your lessons into paid products and services. Banking from Breakup has been my way of monetizing my mess. The lessons I've learned have been priceless. Thank you to my ex! Yes, shout out to my ex for giving me a blank check and teaching me so many valuable lessons. At the end of the day your breakup is a blank check if you choose to cash it. 

There are lessons in your mess for you to learn from and to share with others. At the end of the day, you can monetize your mess. There is money in your mess. And there is no reason why you can’t capitalize on it. Here’s why? Your lessons can be someone else’s blessings. Every day people are on the internet looking and searching for answers to their own questions. They are looking for solutions to their problems. The amazing thing is that they are willing to pay for information that will help them to change their life. You are the answer to someone else’s problem.

I believe we are all each other’s teachers. And there is something that we can learn from each other. Never underestimate the power of your mess. Especially when it comes to helping someone else with their mess. Let us know what your thoughts are.